As you practice present moment awareness there is no doubt that you will see changes, but demanding immediate profound results is evidence of immaturity. Awareness will trigger change in due time. Don’t force change.
Forcing and manipulating have actually served to stunt real growth. Here is the dynamic: You are unaware of the resentment you have towards a co-worker. Carrying this resentment into a stressful situation, you lash out at this individual with an inappropriate response. You now add feelings of guilt to the mix.
You get labelled a “hothead” who is incapable of dealing with stress and as a result, are continually passed over for promotion. This causes further resentment which carries over into your personal relationships. You lash out again, but this time perhaps your partner is the recipient which causes more personal chaos.
More guilt and resentment piled upon guilt and resentment. This in turn takes a toll on your body, resulting in sleeplessness. You are now even less prepared to deal with daily stresses. The situation becomes more volatile and this downward spiral continues.
Let’s return to the scene of the crime. While in the present moment and in conversation with this co-worker, you become aware that you indeed harbor some resentment towards them. Simply because you are choosing to be aware in the present moment, you find you are able to remain objective towards this resentment. You observe it, keep separate from it and do not allow it to cause you to react emotionally.
When the stressful situation does arise, you do not lash out. The lashing incident never happens but instead true growth has occurred. A small portion of wisdom has been acquired. Positive developments ensue, all indirectly resulting from that one moment of awareness.
Make that choice to be aware this and every succeeding moment! There is no forcing or straining required. Just simply notice. Witness in the here and now. This is all that needs to be done. Why do you think we call it “the present” anyway?